We Have A Winner!

MEGAN LUCAS

"Pretty fly for a furry guy!"

It wasn't easy to pick a winner. In the next few days or so, I'll be revamping this page to combine the best of the entries with the best of my own, but for now, I thought this takeoff on the song "Pretty Fly for a White Guy" was pretty funny. So, it's my winner. Congratulations, Megan!

I'd love to, but I'm afraid I've been neutered. --Paul Gibbs Eee! A mouse! --Christopher Street You've got to be the ugliest baby I've ever laid eyes on! --Edwin Ross Quantrall	See? If I scrunch up my chin this way, I look just like Mr. Ages! --Paul Gibbs
I'm sorry. We don't allow refunds or exchanges on video media. -- Christopher Street	Why, that's right, Timmy. How did you know this was a poppy? --Christopher Street
Who knows, kid? Maybe some day you could be in a real movie, like I was! --Christopher Street Hello? Are you Justin? Have we seen each other? Have we met, at least? --Michael Mark Maquilan OMIGOD! JUSTIN! What have they done to you! AAAACCCKKK! --Megan Lucas	Looks to me that Ross poured green slime all over this one. But it seems clear that Justin is contemplating consulting the Delphic Oracle for his troubles. --Christopher Street Dear God, the rats are singing. The Day of Judgement has come. --Megan Lucas Looks like Justin's agent failed him. --Megan Lucas Is it just me or does Brutus look like the werewolf from the Michael Jackson video "Thriller"? --Megan Lucas
You know, it's kinda creepy. Look closely at Timmy. Look at his vapid face. Look at his slouch. Doesn't he come eerily close to one of the children from "The Land Without Feelings," after drinking Professor Coldheart's frothy brew? It's astounding. And this kid's supposed to be the romantic lead? --Christopher Street	This one also gave me the heebie-jeebies. Look at her! Look at that expression! She has all the intense emotion and feeling of a Muppet! Is it just that dry flint sparks the hottest? Between these two, I can aver all the tenderness and warmth of a rhinocerous in death throes! --Christopher Street God, I hate Netscape. --Michael Mark Maquilan
I was shocked by the size of her hair in this shot. Whereas she looked like a Muppet in the last, she looks like a rooster here. --Christopher Street Damn, I lost a green contact lens... -- Paul Gibbs	Actually, he's singing "The Eye of the Tiger". --Christopher Street Pretty fly for a furry guy! --Megan Lucas
(Chris enters Silly Over-Analyzation Mode) Oh, this is actually a clever attempt by the filmmakers to appeal to Jungian archetypes in the audience's collective psyches. Look! Look at the monolithic tree - this is clearly genotypical of Yggradasil, the tree which held the world together (much like a brochette) in Norse mythology. The filmmakers are playing on the fact that Thorn Valley will be Timmy's home, that it is a dynamic and self-sufficient microcosm easily fit for providing all of his needs, and that it provides a loving, caring community for him to live, work and play productively in. Which is good, seeing as the picture is aimed at babysitting for today's young children, who need to feel assimilated into a loving family. Excuse me a moment. I need to weep for the "new generation." --Christopher Street Why don't they just put up a SIGN that says "Mutated Rats Live Here"? --Megan Lucas Relax, Arthur! They'll never spot the colony from the air! --Jeff McGinnis Behold the power of Cheese! --Edwin Ross Quantrall	You'll need to open up wider than this to swallow this tripe. --Christopher Street As Timmy sidled close to nuzzle with Jenny, he suddenly remembered the piece of gum behind his ear. --Christopher Street ...it was just then that they realized that maybe a sequel wasn't such a good career move after all... --Edwin Ross Quantrall Aagh! She's got NIMH 2... and it's contagious! --Christopher Street What kind of mushrooms did you say they were? --Edwin Ross Quantrall I can't do that with you! You're a girl! --Jeff McGinnis
Hey! Here's where we belong... the Sixth Circle of Cinema Hell! --Christopher Street You get the hotdogs and I'll grab the marshmallows! --Edwin Ross Quantrall	Hello, I'm Jenny for 'Armani.' --Christopher Street I HATE bean-bag chairs! --Edwin Ross Quantrall
...and they can keep it. --Christopher Street	This picture put a pleasing image in my head - a fantasy of Timmy as Sisyphus, doomed to roll a boulder up a hill for all eternity for his sins in appearing in THE SECRET OF NIMH 2. It did much to alleviate the pain. --Christopher Street
Personally, I can't see why Timmy's so afraid of those arrows. :) --Christopher Street	'The Truth is Out There, Jenny.' 'You're not Fox Mulder, Timmy' --Vaughn L. Porter
Nice ass...but I sure as hell wouldn't pay to see it. --Kristin Blomstedt	Gee, Timmy; you nearly let me get crushed by some books, foiled my plot to invade Thorn Valley, and almost got us killed by blowing us sky-high! What a privilege it is to have you as my brother! --Edwin Ross Quantrall
Somewhere, out there... Oops, wrong movie. --Jeff McGinnis	Jenny, you should have thought of that before we left! --Jeff McGinnis Excuse me... for... a moment. I... think I'm... getting... morning sickness! --Jeff McGinnis